Many posts are going up around the Blogosphere about what people want for Christmas. I admit, there are plenty of material things that I could use and use well. But more than that, there are eight things that I want that Santa just doesn’t have room for in his bag (that’s what she said).
Such as…
1. The Vampire Craze to be Over–I can’t be the only one who is over people’s recent adoration of the blood-sucking undead. It was cute for awhile…you know, sparkly vampires and all. But now it’s just gotten to be sad. I think I’m ruined on vampires for life.
2. People To Use Correct Grammar–Not a day goes by that I don’t log on to Facebook to be confronted by a their/there/they’re mistake or a “don’t” where a “doesn’t” belongs. People, this stuff is simple and was taught in ELEMENTARY SCHOOL. Catch up already. A mistake here or there is one thing, but habitual offenders make me sick.
3. The End of “-ista” words–Fashionista, Barista, Maxxonista, whateverista. I’m done with it. It doesn’t make it chic or cool to put “-ista” at the end of things. It just makes it cliche.
4. Space for All The Crap I Already Have–Frankly, I while I could use more material things, I also need room to put them. Our 1000 square foot home is percolating with all of the crap that we’ve accumulated as individuals and as a couple. Add a couple of cats and a dog and you have the recipe for a full house…and not the sappy sitcom kind.
5. A Year’s Worth of Weekly Pedicures–My feet take a beating. Let’s be honest, they don’t look pretty on a regular basis. Feet gross me out in general. And my feet are no exception just because they’re on the ends of my legs. A couple of layers of polish and a buffing every week would be an exceptional way to spend a year.
6. Life to Work Like Amazon Prime–I cannot express how lovely it is to order something and have it delivered to me within two days. It’s like almost-instant-gratification for the too-lazy-to-go-to-the-store-types like me. The best part is that I don’t have to speak to anyone–it’s all automated. Score one for technology.
7. The Office Not To Suck Anymore–I used to love this show. Remember The Dundies? Or how abut Diversity Training? Or the time Jim dressed up as Dwight? Yeah, I remember that, too. It was back when the show didn’t suck. I’m so sick of Pam and Jim’s marriage and baby that I’m rooting for both to fail somehow. And that kind of hatred isn’t normal.
8. A New Attitude Towards Exercise–I really need to get back to it, but I can’t help the feeling of dread that accompanies it. Maybe some new gear and headphones would be motivation for awhile, but I’m afraid that’ll fade. What I really need is an attitude adjustment, and preferably one I don’t have to institute on my own.
How about you? What do you want for Christmas?
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I would like all of those goddamn diamond commercials to die a thousand deaths.
WORST part of the holiday season.
I am SO WITH YOU on that last one. Want to know what helped? Lady Gaga’s new CD. DO IT. You won’t regret it…
I completely agree with you about the vampires. I’m also sick of seeing grown women be Team So and So–if a man were doing that to a 17 year old girl? Yeah…I’m pretty sure he would get slammed as worse than a ‘cougar.’
Anyway, I would love unlimited flight tickets and an extraordinarily simple move to Boston!
I’d like “people to use correct grammar”, as well, please!!
I’d like it if songwriters stopped rhyming “fire” and “desire,” as well as “all night” and “all right.”
Yeah I definitely agree with the whole vampire thing. I just don’t understand the fuss. AT ALL.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE Amazon Prime! I am somewhat scared to add up my purchases for this year. If I can buy it on Amazon, I will!
The best part of The Office last week was Kevin sitting on Michael’s lap. And that’s it. I’ve moved on the Parks and Recreation. Oh, Amy Poehler. Swoon.
Have you thought about getting an exercise DVD? When I get sick of the gym, it’s nice to have something like that. You don’t have to leave the house, you can pause the DVD, and pretty much take things at your own pace.
I am totally with you on the vampire fad. Let’s just not take this out on Buffy and her vamp pals….come on, you cannot hate on Spike!
I would like Santa to bring me a nicely wrapped permanent job, with stellar benefits and pay! Amen.
Also, I would like for Christmas, not to get sick anymore. I have spent the greater part of the past 3 months with a cold. No more!
Lastly, I would like to see my friend Kim when I am back for the holidays. I’ll be in touch.
I want to write something as funny as this list! LOVE IT.
But seriously, maybe someone will buy you at an at home pedicure kit…
I would just like to say AMEN.
i agree with courtney, Parks and Recreation is where the funny is at these days. I will still always watch The Office, but I am sick of the lack of realistic consequences on that show. Mr. Scott would have been fired many, many times by now.
1. Ditto on grammar. It makes my skin crawl.
2. Ditto on exercise. I suck.
3. I am a total Amazon whore. We should start a fan club. Too bad we don’t live anywhere near each other.
I loved my Amazon Prime, I had it for a couple years, but because I’ve really stopped shopping I decided not to renew. I know I spent less on Amazon this year than the yearly cost of membership, so I just hit delete. Felt kind of good
I agree wholeheartedly about the vampires.
I am so sick of Vampires too! Just go away please.
Totally with you on the first one. I was done with the whole vampire thing before it was started. Can we please move on to an obsession I can at least understand?
I agree on the vampires as well. It’s like no one knew anything about vampires or that there was never a vampire movie/tv show/book before Twilight. Uh, what about Buffy, The Lost Boys, or even My Best Friend is a Vampire? I guess a lot of the people hooked on the new vampire craze weren’t born yet to see the last one. Maybe that’s the problem.
On a dumb note & the whole ista thing, being a GH fan, every time I see the TJ Maxx commercial where they call their shoppers Maxxinistas, I think they ripped it off from Spinelli. More than you wanted to know, I’m sure, but you’re right. The istas are everywhere. Kind of like when everything was Mc this and Mc that.
Haha I’m with you on all of these ESPECIALLY the vampire one and the -ista one. So annoying people, get over both these fads!!
Though I know it’s impossible since Season 3 just ended, all I want for Christmas is Mad Men Season 4 to start in January instead of August 2010. Hey, a girl can dream.
A million dollars would be nice but more realistically I’d really like my kitchen renovation to be finished. Santa do you hear me?! I’m done with microwave meals.
Definitely with you on the vampire thing. Seriously, sucking blood is not that sexy. I like Twilight for the plot, I couldn’t care less about the vampire bit.
I also like perfect grammar, but it’s very possible I find myself slipping because I text more now…and somehow it’s taking away my English major skills.
I definitely need more space, I definitely used to like the Office better, and I am DEFINITELY working on the exercise attitude.
CHEERS!
I don’t understand the vampire craze, or how vampires are still “cool.” Wasn’t there already a vampire craze in the 90s with Anne Rice books-turned-movies and Buffy? Or am I missing the subtlety or something?
I wholeheartedly agree with #s 1-3.
I could use some new friends. Sometimes a girl gets lonely when surrounded by people who are either male or old or both.
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