Open Letters Friday, Volume XIV

Open Letters Friday is a segment here at PCL for your reading and writing enjoyment. I’ll share with you some of my open letters for the week and you’ll get the opportunity in comments to share yours. Now, tell me, who do you need to write to this week?

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Dear Christmas Weekend Plans:

Please solidify yourselves.  I’m sick of not knowing exactly what’s going on.  I’m a bit of a control freak like that.  So if you could just go ahead and fix the problem (your problem, not my inability to relinquish control…I’m fine with that), I’d appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Confused Kim

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Dear The Mister’s Office:

I know usually you like to be clean and tidy.  And frankly, I’m cool with that.  But the need for space for Christmas presents is dire and I appreciate you taking one for the team and allowing yourself to be filled to the brim with gifts for other people.  I assure you, soon you’ll be back to your Star Wars memorabilia only.

Sincerely,

An Overboard Amazon Prime User

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Dear My Work Office:

I’d appreciate a temperature stabilization.  Yesterday I went from freezing to literally sweating due to your inability to get it right.  It’s simple–we just want a temperature that’s livable.  I’d rather have to throw on a sweater than take a shower when I get home.  It’s a fact.

Yours Not Truly,

Temperature Control Issues Kim

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Dear SNL Christmas Special:

Thanks for reminding me that you didn’t always suck last night.  But here’s a hint:  characters like “Gilly,” the one you based the special around, suck.  That’s why you suck lately.  A total lack of good characters.  There’s nothing memorable.  And starting every episode with a CSPAN fake press conference isn’t going to help.  Fake press conferences are only so funny.  Maybe you could try something else for awhile.

Consider yourself warned.

Kim

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Dear Hair:

Please hang in there.  I know you’re again in desperate need of an overhaul.  My once-perfect highlights are looking less than maintained right now.  Part of the problem is that you grow so damn quickly.  But I won’t blame you.  It’s me.  Once I find a new stylist and some cash, you’re on the top of my list.

Sincerely,

The Person Underneath You

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Now it’s your turn!  Get things off your chest.And you can check out other Open Letters Fridays here.