My entire life is full of stubbornness.
My family is full of good ol’ fashioned stubborn. I think this stems majorly from Grandpa on my dad’s side. He was a stubborn old mule. Kept all kinds of shit that did not need to be kept. Wouldn’t listen to other people’s suggestions–even medical professionals’ suggestions at times–and just generally marched to the beat of his own drummer.
Dad was in full blown denial about losing his hair until this past year. Now it’s only mild denial. He refuses to do anything he doesn’t want to do unless it’s forced upon him. He won’t stop eating all kinds of salt despite the heart issues in our family tree. He puts salt on anything really–pizza, ham, anything. You name it…it isn’t good until you’ve poured some salt on it. My mom bought some low sodium salt replacement stuff. He won’t touch it.
Brother decided four weeks ago he wanted to run a marathon. Most people train for months for this type of event. Not Andy. In all fairness, he runs all the time…like 3-4 miles at a time. His training sessions got as long as 13 miles, but never anywhere near the requisite 26.2 miles. On Sunday, he ran that marathon. He had to walk the last couple of miles, but he finished. When I would tell people about this, they’d tell me he’d never finish. I disagreed. ”You’ve never met my brother, perhaps, but he’ll do it. He’ll just put his life at risk to do it.”
The Mister is quite possibly one of the most stubborn people I have ever met. He refused to go to the dentist for years and only went this year when he started having a toothache. It was his wisdom teeth. He needs to have them pulled, but we’re on one of the bottom tier dental plans and they won’t pay for it. His solution? Wait until next year and we’ll upgrade. Toothaches be damned…he’s not paying an extra dime for that shit.
I can’t say I’m much different. If people tell me that I can’t do something, I do it just to prove them wrong. I jump off cliffs. I climb sand dunes. I complete master’s degrees with just about every obstruction in my way possible.
Have I put myself at risk because of this? Absolutely.
Would I have it any other way? Not likely.
This all came to mind the other night when sitting around with The Mister and Brooklyn. Brooklyn is the most stubborn dog you will ever meet. This must be the Chow in her. If she does not want to do something, good luck breaking that barrier. You have a better chance at winning the lottery. She does this thing now when she doesn’t feel like doing tricks for treats–she’ll just go lay down on her bed. You can tell she wants the treat. She’ll just be damned if she’s going to give you the satisfaction of shaking your hand for it.
That is Brooklyn the Dog buried in laundry. She wanted to lay there despite the fact that I was sorting clothes. She stood her ground until the end and was almost completely buried by then.
I started thinking about what these embryos will (hopefully) be like one day. Something tells me that there’s a certain amount of stubbornness required for living life in general. There’s probably an added requirement for making it through a pregnancy with me. So I’m thinking that if we make it out the other side, these very well might be the most stubborn creatures ever to roam the Earth. Epic poems will be written about their stubbornness. Monuments will be built to testify to their hardheadedness.
It’s not always such a bad thing. My brother did finish that marathon. My dad is enjoying his food on a daily basis. The Mister was forced to reexamine our dental coverage. Brooklyn…well, at least we know she won’t easily be persuaded by burglars with treats. And me? Well, I keep plugging along.
So if there’s anything I can attest to, it’s that being stubborn is just about the most annoying quality a person has…and it’s also probably the best one suited for survival.
So go survive…go thrive…and go be a bit stubborn. You’ll piss some people off, but you’ll likely get what you want in the end.
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
I think that stubbornness, tempered by a dash of practicality is the best way to go. Possibly because that’s the way I roll. Who knows? I think my biggest problem is not that someone says “you can’t do that” so I go do it to prove them wrong, it’s that I’m always thinking “well hell, I can’t do that!” and when someone says “oh yes, you can,” I think “Screw you – I can’t and I won’t and good luck trying to make me!” This can be awfully counterproductive.
Speaking of burglars with treats, we always laugh at that Allstate commercial with the burglars and the bone – Fonzie would totally be that dog. “Hey, you guys are great!” – we say that to him now, and he gets all excited.
I also have the same problem you have. I think that’s Brooklyn’s problem with these treats. She knows that we’re asking her to do it because we think she can so she’s all “I’LL SHOW THESE BASTARDS.”
If Brooklyn weren’t so nervous, she’d probably let burglars in like that. Rocky totally would have. “Come on in guys…take what you need.”
Stubborness is what got me through law school. That and a really KICKASS friend.
(Oh, and it’s also what got me through the freakin’ bar exam the 400 times I took it)
Yes, see…there’s an excellent point in favor of stubbornness.
I’m so not stubborn. At all. I’m so passive…not passive enough to let people walk all over me or anything, but when Scott and I are deciding on something I pretty much let him do what he wants and I just go along with it. I’m pretty mellow like that.
The Mister usually ends up getting his way, but that’s after much back and forth and stubbornness. I guess he’s just better at it sometimes than I am.
Nothing wrong with being stubborn. I wish I was more stubborn than I am. I’ve been so ‘woe is me’ and defeated the last few years, I just roll over too easily now. Hopefully when I some control back, I’ll get my stubbornness too.
Read the kids, “The Zax,” by Dr. Seuss. They’ll find a kindred spirit.