Sometimes when I start Random Thoughts posts, I feel like Jerry Seinfeld doing his routine at the beginning and end of Seinfeld. Or better yet, that episode where Kramer imitates Jerry’s standup routine. What’s the deal with politics?
The entertainment gossip world was all abuzz late last week with the speculation and confirmation that Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber broke up. All I could think of was “about time.” That couple was as fake as a three dollar bill.
I was falling asleep during Weekend Update on SNL this weekend, but I knew that Drunk Uncle made an appearancewhen The Mister started laughing so hard he was coughing. First of all, the laughing until you choke thing is mine…don’t steal it. Secondly, I think he is the biggest fan of Drunk Uncle alive. He’ll be talking about his SNL appearances for a good three days after they happen. Sometimes longer.
If you hadn’t heard, we traded in my energy efficient Ford Focus for a mommymobile Dodge Caravan. Mentally I’m giving myself side eye, but it was really the only best option. The ride is smoother, which makes for a better ride right now with my touchy bladder. But I’ll still side eye myself for it.
Well informed word on the street is that Hillary Clinton will be stepping down as Secretary of State in January. I cannot tell you how sad this makes me. I know that she probably needs a damn break. No one has been working harder than that woman these past four years, save the president himself. But I don’t want to live in a world where Hillary isn’t kicking ass in that position. I just don’t wanna!
I also have made the switch from PC to Mac. Well, I haven’t fully made it yet. I have to backup things and clean off my old computer, but I purchased and have received a MacBook Air. So between that and the minivan, my world is a flutter with newness lately. I sound like a baller, but honestly I’m not.
I’m just hoping that Hils is taking a hiatus from politics to prepare for her run in 2016. That is the only reason that I am prepared to accept in my mind. Period.
I think your purchase of a mommy mobile means that you are officially more grown-up than I am now. I’m still hanging on to my shaggin wagon.
I have no idea who Selena Gomez even is, but the idea that a girl is dating Justin Bieber makes it automatically fake as far as I’m concerned. That dude is about 100X more feminine than me, no lie.
You’re not fooling anyone – all readers of PCL know that you’re a baller, brawler, AND shot-caller, and a minivan won’t change that
Justin Bieber’s got a big tour coming up. If there are any tickets left, I’m sure they’re being snatched up by teenage girls that think they have a shot now that Selena is out of the way.
My personality can be summed up with one example. From the age of 15 to the age of 17, I annually lobbied my Catholic youth group to have a retreat about whips and chains and was labeled as having a "wicked sense of humor." I think it was a compliment.
I am the clumsiest person you've ever met...even if you haven't met me yet. If there's bad luck to be had, I attract it like a magnet. That's what gives me stories and makes me special. At least that's what I tell myself to keep from falling apart at times. It's also what gives me my world-famous wicked sense of humor. Because if you can't laugh at yourself you're probably mute.
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I’m just hoping that Hils is taking a hiatus from politics to prepare for her run in 2016. That is the only reason that I am prepared to accept in my mind. Period.
I think your purchase of a mommy mobile means that you are officially more grown-up than I am now. I’m still hanging on to my shaggin wagon.
I have no idea who Selena Gomez even is, but the idea that a girl is dating Justin Bieber makes it automatically fake as far as I’m concerned. That dude is about 100X more feminine than me, no lie.
You’re not fooling anyone – all readers of PCL know that you’re a baller, brawler, AND shot-caller, and a minivan won’t change that
I do call shots. But that’s about as close as I get to that description. And that’s not even considering that the shots that I call are often ignored.
I wish there were more wagons available out there. Although, it was nice having the van to get stuff from Ikea.
I just poured my guts out on my blog, so that’s what’s on my mind. Whether or not I should have done it, but oh wells.
You’re such a baller.
I just read and responded to your blog.
This reputation I have as a baller is quite intimidating to me.
Justin Bieber’s got a big tour coming up. If there are any tickets left, I’m sure they’re being snatched up by teenage girls that think they have a shot now that Selena is out of the way.
You’re gonna rock the minivan, yes, indeed! I just switched to an Air too. It’s made life lighter on my wrists.