Verdict Is In: I’m Normal, You’re Normal, We’re All Normal

Our little experiment was a success.  Seeing as I usually only get about 10-15 comments, I was prepared to do this very scientifically.  I had a steno pad and pen ready to document how normal and or abnormal I was.  But as it turns out, this was a very popular post and people had very specific things they wanted to say either in addition to or in lieu of a simple “normal” or “abnormal.”  And I really dug that.  I’ve included some people’s opinions in my report.  If you’re not listed in here, it’s not that I didn’t read or enjoy your comments…there were just too many to fit in.

So although I could tally up the responses  that did give a specific 10 point list, I think it’d be better to summarize my findings than to do some  sort of pseudo-scientific study of something that’s not really scientific at all.

Without further adieu or a-do here are the “results”:

1.  Is it normal to think that Coke Zero does not taste more like regular Coke and, in fact, just gives a bad aftertaste akin to a stale Coke that’s been outside in the garage for years?

What you said:  The answer is that most of you appreciate my love for Diet Coke and my distaste (pun intended) for Coke Zero.  In fact, only one person was so emphatic about Coke Zero that they said it “rocks.” (I’m looking at you Ms. TC.)  The truth of the matter is that Coke Zero is a ridiculous product.

What I think:  If you want a diet product, drink Diet Coke.  If you don’t, drink regular Coke.  Don’t try and half-ass it with Coke Zero.  Frankly, I used to drink regular pop but stopped when I realized I was drinking an entire day’s worth of calories in a few hours in addition to everything else.  It’s a small step, but it’s one I’ve stuck to for years now.  I actually like the taste of Diet Coke now.  But Coke Zero is a silly impostor.  Remember that.

2.  Is it normal to sometimes eat a small (or large) carton of ice cream or some other frozen treat for dinner in lieu of a real meal?

What you said:  This one was a pretty emphatic normal for me vote.  Two people (YogaforCynics and Meredith) specifically found this acceptable when Ben & Jerry’s was involved.  Lydia rightfully pointed out the cliche about women eating ice cream and watching made-for-television movies, which is not lost on me, but I still do it anyhow.  Maybe cliches exist for a reason…

What I think:  When you get down to it, a pint of ice cream has a good mix of dairy and carbs.  It’s a contained meal, and you probably won’t go back for seconds afterward.  So really, it’s like a diet food when you think about it.

3.  Is it normal to not want to do outdoors stuff…camp, hike, mountain bike, climb rocks, etc.?

What you said:  This was kind of a weird abnormal area.  Most of you appreciated my point of view, but still reserved the right to like the outdoors. Some of you truly understood my disdain for the great outdoors, but most of you just tolerated my indooritis.  Alanna rightfully pointed out that people like me shouldn’t do the outdoors and ruin the time for the outdoorsy people.  I wholeheartedly agree.

What I think:   There is a reason humans created shelter, fire, air conditioning and cable television.  Sure it might not be the healthiest choice, but it is the more enjoyable one.  I like sitting in my backyard and watching the dog run around and patrol the place as much as the next person, but I don’t like spending hours in “The Great Outdoors” (the actual place, not the John Candy/Dan Aykroyd flick of the same name…I do like that) doing god knows what and getting bitten, burned and exhausted. 

4.  Is it normal to not want to help your significant other do manual labor because, in your opinion, they get bossy?

What you said:  If they’re going to get bossy, let them do it on their own.  Rebekah and SleepyJane were able to empathize (or sympathize…I get the two mixed up all of the time) with me on this one specifically, as they have significant others who get bossy doing manual labor.

What I think:  The Mister gets awfully bad at communicating properly when he’s working on a project.  This means one of two things:  either something will go wrong because he’s snippy at me or one or both of us will get royally pissed off and tell the other one where to go in less than civil terms.  My therapist (and here I go being one of those people talking about what their therapist said…) has given me a free pass on doing manual labor with The Mister as he gets too icky (my term, not hers).  I think we should all take my therapist’s advice and shut down the dual manual labor camp if the other person can’t be at least civil.

5.  Is it normal to have mixed feelings about the whole Twilight thing?

What you said:   This was one where I was partially abnormal, but slightly more normal than not.  I seemed to find a lot of people telling me to make up my mind about this and move on.   Then there were others like SuperCareo, Becky and Shawna that caught my drift and have torn and/or mixed feelings on the subject.

What I think:

6.  Is it normal to miss going to church on a regular (or any) basis but still not go because, really, you don’t agree with the politics?

What you said:  Some of you were torn about this.  There were a few who agreed and some who go to church and don’t understand my conflict.  Tammy even told me to pick a side.  Then there was the suggestion that I find a church whose politics I do agree with.  But many of you understood the 20-something natural conflict about church and religion.

What I think:   I’d love to find a church that agrees with my politics, but it’s hard because for all of the faults I still consider myself Catholic.  I don’t know why, but I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to find a way to let go of that.  I’ve thought about finding a Unitarian church because I believe in their politics, but I find myself telling them to get off the fence when it comes to religious ideas.  Plus, I’d still consider myself a Catholic and I find non-denominational stuff a bit too far for me.

7.  Is it normal to wait for your dog to pick some food up off of the floor rather than pick it up yourself?

What you said:  Emphatic I’m normal.  Horray!

What I think:  If Rocky the Dog eats it, that’s fine with me.  One less thing to swiffer up.

8.  Is it normal to simultaneously not be ready to have kids but have the estrogen in your body take over when you see a cute outfit or hear of a high school classmate having a child?

What you said:  Yes.  I’m normal.  This was pretty clear.

What I think:  Is there something in the water lately that is making the general population more fertile and reproductive?  Because every time I log onto Facebook someone has an ultrasound picture up or is announcing the birth of some other spawn.  And even though I’ve got other ideas for my next year or two before we have kids or try to, I find myself getting all wishy-washy on my conviction to wait when I see babies and little clothes and such.  I blame hormones.  I wouldn’t be so emotional about spawn if it weren’t for hormones.

9.  Is it normal to find Simon Cowell incredibly hot?

What you said:  Most of you said this was not at all normal.  Thankfully a few of you, like LiLu found me to be somewhat normal.  Christina allowed me this one because she has a crush on Hugh Laurie (whom I also adore).

What I think:  Simon Cowell is a very attractive man and his snoodiness adds to his level of attractiveness to me.  I want him to pick apart my singing and performance and then throw me onto the judge’s table and have his way with me.  Call me crazy, but that just sounds like fun.  But he has to say “Off you go,” at least twice during the session of rockus lovemaking.

10.  Is it normal to not like The Catcher in the Rye?

What you said:  Actually, I thought I’d be abnormal, but most of you agreed at how overrated this book is.  J.D. Sallinger better not read this blog, or he might be offended.  Of course, he shouldn’t be considering that book went nowhere.

What I think:  You know what I did after I read The Catcher in the Rye? I threw the book at the wall.  It irritated me to no end throughout that this character was just wandering about and trying to find himself in such ridiculous circumstances.  And furthermore, the ending was just so anti-climatic.  I’m not asking for fireworks, but at least make us feel like we read your book for a reason, Mr. Sallinger.  To me it seems like a waste of time.  That being said, I’d recommend everyone read it so they can come to the same conclusion as me.

So there you have it folks.  I’m mostly normal with a twinge of abnormal.  How did you fare?

Tagged as: babies, Catcher in the Rye, Catholicism, church, Coke Zero versus Diet Coke, estrogen, ice cream, kids, my therapist said, normal contest 2009, outdoors, religion, Rocky the Dog, Simon Cowell, The Mister